All the Single Ladies

Went on date #4 with Winky this past Saturday for dinner at a Mex place in his hood.  Dinner was delightful, except for the part where he said he HATES people’s cooking and only goes out to eat - ever.  When I told him I love cooking, he said “Well, please don’t ever cook for me.”  No problemo buddy.  I should have ordered margaritas, multiple, but I didn’t.  Mistake #1.

After dinner, it was a “hey want to come over to my apt 2 blocks away and watch a movie” kinda move on his part.  I went along because why not, I’m not a prude, right?  I’ll go see what’s up on the 40th floor.  Mistake #2.

Within 10 minutes of being upstairs, we start making out on the couch with Slackers playing in the background.  He suggests we “move to the bedroom.”  I smirk and shake my head - cause I’m not really down with that plan.  I’m PMS-y and not in the mood to get it on with him.  Eventually though, I find myself in his room and an overwhelming since of prude takes over every part of my body.  I become 15 again and I don’t want any funny business going on below the fold.  I’m completely fine with above the fold though - and enjoying it.  So maybe I’m sending him mixed signals? Ooops.  He’s obviously excited and asks me what he’s supposed to do.  I say…umm….yourself???  It was so awkward and I could have easily solved the problem with just a few motions, but no - I played prude and let him take care of himself.  I pleaded the “I don’t do this with people I’ve only known a week” excuse, but really it’s because I was bloated, tired, not super turned on by him, and most importantly, completely sober.

Needless to say….this was the key to the kibosh.  We didn’t make plans for a next date and I haven’t heard from him in 4 days.  Bye, bye Winky!  In the words of Liz Lemon - ANOTHER SUCCESSFUL INTERACTION WITH A MAN!