After reading this item on The Hairpin, I headed over to the Resolution Simplifier to see what it would make of my real resolutions (despite the fact that I steadfastly refuse to make New Year’s resolutions, so all of my “real” ones were, in fact, fake). I put in “Read more” and it told me to watch more movies with closed captions, so…anyway! What if your New Year’s resolution was to get a boyfriend. Well, my friends, wonder no more. -A

After reading this item on The Hairpin, I headed over to the Resolution Simplifier to see what it would make of my real resolutions (despite the fact that I steadfastly refuse to make New Year’s resolutions, so all of my “real” ones were, in fact, fake). I put in “Read more” and it told me to watch more movies with closed captions, so…anyway! What if your New Year’s resolution was to get a boyfriend. Well, my friends, wonder no more.

-A